Pictures of reality

"There is a reality even prior to heaven and earth..."
(Dai-O Kokushi)

It seems that many people who visit us here at Egely have difficulties accepting that there is this reality.

No matter what we call it.

The thought that the "reality" we as individuals perceive is a subjective projection of our thoughts, feelings, and psychological and physical state may be difficult to swallow. But realizing the ultimate reality frees us from being ensnared by our ego, making it possible for us to choose, at every moment, how we live.

Who wouldn't want this?

Ubegrænset sind

Jeg måtte starte dagen med at tilgive mig selv og håbe på universel tilgivelse. Bær over med mig idag! Vær tålmodig med mig! I dag er jeg fordomsfuld og utålmodig! Der er begivenheder og reaktioner, som jeg ikke kan få på plads og det forvirrer.

Jeg ønsker at råbe højt: "Tag jer sammen! I siger, at I er buddhister og følger vejen, men I overgiver jer ikke til jeres praksis. I læser bøger og hygger jer med at meditere og diskutere, men at realisere? Hvad sker der?" Mit hjerte siger, at jeg burde være glad over, at så mange tager det første skridt. Men hvordan kan jeg stå til rådighed for dem? Og har de mon overhovedet lyst til, at nogen gør det?

Alle disse egoistiske betragtninger, al den karma, jeg skaber...

Answering Senshin!

This is a special little altar on the kitchen shelf. I offer water, flowers and incense to Jizo daily and he keeps an eye on me (and the universe).

He fits in well with my tenzo practice, since he is the saviour of souls who have to suffer in the underworld. The qualities of Jizo are compassion, optimism, and courage.

This specific Jizo statue is designed by Jan Chozen Bays Roshi. He smiles alot. Right now he is standing under flowering forsythia branches, enjoying the icicles outside the window and the promise of spring.

What works for me may not work for you.

Training traditional Rinzai Zen koan training has given me insight that goes deeper(?), beyond(?) psychological insight alone or spiritual insight alone. And has shown me how I actually can not avoid integrating this into my everyday life. It's not just a toolbox, it's not just cognitive training or coaching, it's not just mindfulness training or learning to see through this construction I call myself, it's not just feeling the universe resonate. Although I now do have tools, although I now can see my patterns, although I now know I can see where I'm going, although I now see how my decisions fit in on a larger scale... and how I can't avoid being responsible for everything. I feel a grounding and a contentment that both gives and creates peace.

Oh, I'm most definitely immature in all of this. No doubt about that. Please: don't listen to me! Try it or ignore it.

Oh, Happy monk!

This practice brings me such joy that I want everyone in the entire universe to be doing it! I know, "greedy, greedy!!!!!" But I can't help it.

I was certainly afraid in the beginning. Of failing! I mean, I was good at accomplishing things --- and then this koan practice? I had to fight myself for years, somehow knowing that this would be the most direct path for me. But, maybe not really, really wanting to break through. Then there are no more good excuses. So I thought.

With a strong teacher, there is no possibility of "pseudo-insight", intellectual musings or psychological games. OK, of course there is, but the more I just sit with koans, the more I meet with my teacher, the more clearly I can sort out what is what --- and really take responsibility for it. I live more living-ly because of this and the compassion I feel stems from knowing what all this truly is and not from a "feeling" of thinking, "this is right, this is a pity, etc."

Winter living

It's really winter now! Like the winter I always imagine remembering from my childhood. Snowed IN! Lots of hours to sit, play with the cats, look at the drifting snow caught by trees, see bamboo catch whirling snowflakes.

And still. I have been so very busy today, one job following the next, just one step after another,

working,

eating,

working,

working ...

blogging.

Not at all considering where this is going.
THIS is living!

Taking care of stuff

Our wonderful across-the-street neighbor donated a tomato-plant orchard to the monastery. This was a whole new world for me: tomatoes in a rainbow of colors and a spectrum of sizes; some good for salads, some for sauces, some for pickling, some for frying, some for pizza...

The small, firm, tiger-striped tomatoes were my favorites for any and every purpose, and the plum-shaped yellow together with the plum-shaped red brightened any salad bowl.

I learned how to take care of the plants by watching Thomas. Because of my back, I couldn't pinch or water all of them at any one go, so I visited them a few at a time, spaced out through the day. I learned to love that pungent tomato-stalk smell on my fingers!

When things need taking care of, we take care of them. We just open ourselves up to their various needs and do these various, necessary jobs. We figure out how and when.

Like cleaning. I've never understood why some people don't enjoy cleaning. We get to practice awareness AND see an immediate result; we learn to ration our energy AND play with water!

Taknemmelighed

Hvor overstømmende det end lyder, er jeg så evigt taknemmelig for, at jeg må praktisere i dette liv. Alle dem, som er "gået" før mig har gjort dette muligt og jeg indånder alle deres ord og bestræbelser, ligesom jeg indånder alles ord og bestræbelser. Jeg lever mit liv gennem disse åndedrag og fyldes med undren, glæde og taknemmelighed.

Hvor utallige alle væsener end er, lover jeg at frelse dem alle.
Hvor uudtømmelige mine vrangforestillinger end er, lover jeg at udrydde dem alle.
Hvor umålelige Dharma lærdommene end er, lover jeg at mestre dem alle.
Hvor endeløs Buddhas Vej end er, lover jeg at følge den.

Am I polishing a tile?

Huai-rang went into the zendo and asked Ma-tsu: "What are you aiming at by sitting there in meditation like that?"
Ma-tsu answered: "I want to become a buddha."

Huai-rang then picked up a tile and began to polish it.

Ma-tsu asked him: "What are you doing?"
Huai-rang answered: "I'm polishing this tile to make it into a mirror."
Ma-tsu replied: "How can you make a mirror by polishing a tile?"
His teacher said: "How can sitting in meditation make a buddha?"

Ma-tsu asked, "Then what would be right?"
"It is like the case of an ox pulling a cart: if the cart does not go, would it be right to hit the cart or would it be right to hit the ox?"

Ma-tsu didn't reply.

Huai-rang continued: "Do you think you are practicing sitting meditation, or do you think you are practicing sitting Buddahood? If you are practicing sitting meditation, meditation is not sitting or lying. If you are practicing sitting Buddahood, 'Buddha' is not a fixed form. In the midst of transitory things, one should neither grasp nor reject. If you keep the Buddha seated, this is murdering the Buddha; if you cling to the form of sitting, this is not attaining its inner principle."

Mysteries

Since we opened our temple (and monastery) here, we have met openness, friendliness, curiosity, and tolerance.

We have received, however, 2 interesting, nearly anonymous letters - the second just the other day. Written like a mandala, around and around in the margins of an ad, that we all receive in our mailboxes:

Vestens mystik (Western mysticism)

Østens mystik (Eastern mysticism)
en buddhas datter (a daughter of buddha)
Hun tror på sin mester (She has faith in her master)
her og nu (here and now)
Gud har navn på alle Guder (God knows the names of all Gods)
Hvor sidder hemmeligheden (Where is the secret to be found)

His first communication was rather more ambivalent - something about Buddhists being welcome on our road, but not in his church. I was thinking that it might be nice to meet the man who writes us these greetings; we know he is Christian and elderly and lives pretty close by. And this morning, when I shook the envelope, a flurry of small, scissor-cut pieces of paper was suddenly scattered over my keyboard. And on one of these pieces of paper, he wrote: I would like you to visit.