lørdag den 27. juni 2009

Knowing what to do


Today, after morning zazen, I collapsed while walking out the zendo door. Something purely physical/somatic - a "snap" I could feel and hear. Suddenly I couldn't bear my own weight.

Now: aside from the scrapes and bruises, it's like something has disappeared from me; a burden of my own creation has exploded - and I am free.

Now: I know what has to be done and can just go on with my life, with living.

I am thankful.

onsdag den 24. juni 2009

The penny drops...


I've been reading alot of accounts of how Buddhist temples, monasteries and places of practice are established.

And I can see - in most of the stories - that it is the sangha that gets it all together.

I've been conflicted for the longest time about how Egely should be established. And now I finally see that it must be through our mutual efforts of practice, of dana, of sila. Then this place will flourish from the combined energies of us all and be open to more energy. Flowing, nothing forced.

Earlier, I had figured on "if you build it, they will come". So, I have driven myself crazy about fund-raising strategies, our half impoverished state, etc. I have considered the commercial uses of meditation, the secularization of Buddhist practices in order to accrue building funds; I have been envious of those meditation teachers who exploit the practice for simply commercial gain, even though they ARE selling something they really believe in the value of (knowing that the world can be changed).

Today, I feel liberated from this self-inflicted burden. I will not single-handedly build the monastery, I will not single-handedly fund this project. Please, those of you who need to have a place to come to practice Zen, those of you, who need a teacher - Come! Build! Stay! Help realize the potentials of these walls, this earth, of (and for) us all!

And I - with all my heart - once again am thankful for the work of all of you that have been here and done the renovations, the building, the planting, the weeding, the giving. I hope you know that Egely is yours and I hope that you will return!

lørdag den 20. juni 2009


View from my window

In this one reality that we share there are so many views!

Today, I discovered one of the reasons why I don't feel secure about Eckart Tolle. There's just something missing. Maybe it's maturity. And maybe there's also a nagging feeling that he is giving people a "recipe" for reaching an enlightened state that really can't be reached by just reading words (unless you happen to be THERE, where the only thing you need is that last push).

And then, of course, there's alot of something, too. He just doesn't speak my language. I probably should be very thankful that precisely his words inspire people to dig deeper, see more clearly, and breathe more easily.

I guess I really have to work on this judgemental side of myself...