What is really good about zazen is "waking up". Things that are unclear and troubling vanish - and the light just shines on through. The issues don't disappear, but they are certainly put in perspective. And the whole world unfolds.When, for some reason, I don't sit on my pillow for days on end, I can feel myself slipping back into habitual, unreflected behavior. Oh, boy! Then I start to resist practice. I can see it all clearly happening, in some dualistic sense.
Dogen has said,
If practice and realization were two things, as it appears to an ordinary person, each could be recognized separately. But what can be met with recognition is not realization itself, because realization is not reached by a deluded mind.Hmmm.
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Hvor er det rart at høre at andre har det på samme måde - jeg ser det igen og igen; hvis jeg af en eller anden grund tillader min praksis at blive udvandet, så starter en ond cirkel der trækker mig nedad, helt indtil jeg lige pludselig genkender den dynge møg jeg føler mig placeret i. Sådan plejede livet jo altid at være, men nu kan jeg genkende møget for hvad det er, og jeg kan ikke bilde mig selv ind at det er 'godt nok'. Jeg har brug for at kunne hæve mig over mit møg, så jeg kan se hvad det er, og hvor det kommer fra - og det kan jeg kun gennem min praksis.
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